I have learned it is very simple to be a hater; very hard to be a fan.
It takes a little more help to be an effective hater, but here's the rules. For the one person who might read this who is not me, let me know if I missed something.
1. Hold on to some loose fact about the team you're hating on like a starving dog holding on to a piece of meat.
2. If some positive fact comes out about the team you hate? Deny the fact or immediately slant the positivity. Bonus points if you direct it back to point 1.
3. If the team is vindicated of wrongdoing, hold on to the fact that the team got away with it and the truth is still out there to be found.
4. Make sure you get as many ugly and hateful comments out about the team and fans along the way.
and this one is MEGA important:
5. Immediately accuse the team's fanbase (that you hate on) of being delusional and wearing homer glasses. At all times you MUST do this.
About 13 months went by of this whole Auburn ordeal. After the Cecil Newton admission that he worked with some yahoos from Miss State about possibly receiving money for Cam to attend Miss State there wasn't anything even close to an actual fact presented.
I can tell you as an Auburn fan I was nervous at first. Very nervous. Then I was angry. I have never seen a college athlete drug through the dirt like Cam Newton was. And the phrase 'pay for play' was brought up as if this were all of a sudden a new, fresh concept within college football. It was a stunning process.
As time went on I grew calloused to the whole thing. Then more at ease. I kept waiting on some hard fact to come out that would sink Auburn or Newton and nothing came. Simply more innuendo and generated smoke, not from the event itself but from people desparately trying to fan something out of nothing.
The last gasp would be the Chizik 'confrontation' when the NCAA lady famously said, "The investigation isn't over yet." People cackled with glee...that's right Auburn! It's not over yet!
Well, it's over now. You know it's been on my mind, could you stand right here, look me straight in the eye and say...that's it's over now. (Alice in Chains, anyone?)
All that's left is the rejoicing and the haters. I know what side I'm on. Heck, I could have told you that all along.
If you are a hater, consider letting it go. I know that might be crazy talk but maybe one day you can put down your pitchfork and join society again. If not, hold on to that hate. I hope it keeps you warm at night.